Have you ever heard the song by Kenny Chesney, “Don’t Blink?” Trust me friend, a hundred years goes faster than you think, so don’t blink…..
It may be a cliché, but seriously: time goes by in the blink of an eye. My granddaughter, Olivia, started pre-school this week. WHAT?! How did that happen?! Wasn’t she just learning how to walk? Sitting in my lap telling me “stories” about piggies?
The funny thing about time is that it also has a way of putting things into perspective. I’ve mentioned before that when I am going through something uncomfortable/difficult/stressful, I always tell myself that it is only a small amount of time and I can get through it!
After having more than half of my femur replaced, and then having the incision draining – which forced a halt to my PT, sending me home instead of to rehab, I had several moments of “will I ever walk again and will this incision heal?”
Some days seemed longer than others. I was worried by the amount of drainage, and the pain was intense. But as each day passed, I reminded myself: things will get better. I need to be kind to myself and realize that after 21 surgeries in less than 2 1/2 years, it will take a little time to start feeling better.
I survived Ewing’s Sarcoma Cancer and I will survive these tough days! It was 32 years ago on August 22nd that I was diagnosed with Ewing’s Sarcoma Cancer. THIRTY TWO YEARS! Talk about time passing! I have always been the type of person who tries to fully enjoy the moments and not rush my life away.
On August 22nd, I had my follow-up appointment with my orthopedic surgeon, Dr. Anderson. (Remember, my “bestie” after anesteshia?) She was pleased that the drainage stopped and thinks the incision looks good. I will see my plastic surgeon, Dr. Iorio on August 29th, and hopefully he will be able to remove every other staple and be pleased with my progress. There is a reason they remove every other and not all of them at once, but I can’t explain it!
Dr. Iorio is an incredibly gifted and talented surgeon who truly invests in his patients. He is kind enough to explain things to you in a way that you can understand, without making you feel like an idiot! When anesthesia leaves me groggy for several days after surgery, he is kind enough to repeat the same information without being annoyed. My daughter was finally able to meet him when I had this last surgery and she is a fan! Julie thinks he’s the “bomb.”
One thing I respect most about Dr. Iorio is that he paints an entire picture.
When I say to him, “so how do you think things went?” He responds by saying, “things went fine but I worry about the incision healing and you have a long road ahead of you.” He’s just honest. I need that, and I am impressed with how he handles these conversations.
The road ahead of me is a long one and there are days where I wonder if I will walk again.
I recently reached out to this doctor I met during the beginning of my journey – Dr. Sarah Carlson, who is just such a kind soul. I can’t say the same about everyone. The vascular team was rounding one morning and this female Chief Resident was anything but kind. When I asked her questions, she was dismissive and turned around in her Ugg boots and left to see the next patient without even giving me the time of day.
Thankfully, Dr. Carlson stayed behind and said she would come back after rounds to answer my questions. I was so in awe of how nice she was. True to her word, she did come back and answered my questions. She stopped in a few more times during my stay. She has now moved to another facility for her fellowship and I am sure she is just as kind to the folks there.
I recently reached out to her to let her know how surgery went, and I asked her what her thoughts were about me walking again. I explained that once I am finished with hyperbaric, I will most likely only have outpatient PT a few times a week. That worries me.
It’s been 2 1/2 years since I walked on my leg…how will a few hours of PT each week get me walking again?!
Sarah said something that resonated with me. She said I don’t need a PT standing next to me to “do” PT. I can create a schedule of my own at home and work hard at learning to walk again. She said, “the key is having the self-discipline to work on my own.”
What a true statement! It may not be easy, but I am going to work hard to walk again and get my life back!
There are so many beautiful people in my life that I am grateful for!
I don’t want to waste time worrying about the what if’s. Life goes by in the blink of an eye. This time next year, I just may be walking again! That will be a beautiful thing!
The small moments of panic I was having seem to be behind me. This is what I mean: each new day holds new possibilities. Make each day count!
Until next time, be well and go out and do a random act of kindness.